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All hell broke loose that Saturday as Fagunwa Hostel occupants got a free ticket to see a fight between a ‘Slay Queen’ and a ‘Jesus Girl.’ Tinuke and Tami were surrounded by people who acted like they wanted to separate them to end the fight, but didn’t want to. They enjoyed it. Everyone enjoys a good fight in a girls’ hostel.

Tami was on top of Tinuke, slapping her multiples times as the latter kept struggling to pull Tami’s hair in retaliation.

‘Kill me o. Kill me, ashewo! Kill me because I said the truth!’ Tinuke said, screaming but Tami didn’t even reply.
Suddenly, someone’s hands were on Tami’s shoulders, pulling her and pleading with her not to kill the poor girl. She stood up, pulled away from the hands holding her and gave the girl on the ground a long stare before saying, ‘If I ever hear my name or my business in your mouth again, I’ll kill you. I’ll kill you and I’ll go to jail for it.’

There was a collective hush in the crowd occupying the corridor.
The girl who was now staring at her with wide eyes said nothing. There was nothing to say. If Tami said she’ll kill her, she’ll kill her.

You see, the two girls were not enemies. In fact, they were great friends who also happened to be roommates. They did everything together but led blatantly different lives.

Tinuke was a church goer- ‘SU’, as they called her in school, while Tami was the life of the party, the ‘Small Girl Big God.’ Yet, they both went along well, or at least Tami thought they did. Tinuke never spoke ill of whatever she did, not in her presence anyways and she had no idea the former thought her ways ‘evil’.

When they first met, she told Tinuke A, as she was then called to be able to differentiate her from other numerous Tinukes on the floor, of her lifestyle and said playfully that she hoped Tinuke won’t run away. Tinuke had replied, saying, ‘Run away ke? A girl is doing what she can to survive,’ and they had both laughed. How then could she be the one going around, telling people that she was a prostitute? Not just people, but telling her fiancée? What did she ever do to deserve that?

As she turned back to leave, she heard a voice. Nothing smaller than a whisper, but she heard it.

‘But is she lying? Are you not an ashewo?’

She turned back to look at the person who said it. She would recognize that voice anywhere. Funmbi.

‘See me see trouble o!’ Tami screamed, clapping her hands dramatically as she laughed. ‘You too, you’re calling someone ashewo? You? Our mummy? Ori e ti daru.’ She added.

Funmbi, who had gone to face her, looked her dead in the eyes and replied, saying, ‘Ori ti e gan daru. Enh! Me, I don’t deny being a prostitute like you.’

‘Did I deny it?’ She asked, eyebrow up sarcastically.

Funmbi replied, ‘I don’t beat people up for saying the truth about me. I am a prostitute, but I’m better than you. I don’t go around stealing people’s customers.’

‘Sugar Daddy.’ Tami said, feeling agitated. ‘Sugar Daddy Funmbi.’
Then came another voice, this time, Tinuke’s.

‘See them, shameless people. Fighting over a man. It’s not even your fault. I blame men that sleep with you people. Men with no worth, no iota of sense. Men that don’t respect their wives and Children at home.’

Tami turned back to look at her and smiled. Funmbi replied before she could.

‘Ah, you better shut up o. It’s you that knows the kind of men we sleep with abi?’

The crowd began to increase, everyone had told someone that the fight was getting more intense. It was now two Slay queens and one Jesus Girl, nobody being sure of who was fighting who.

Tami laughed. ‘Leave her. Virtuous woman. God’s assistant. Judging people before obtaining LL.B. Ailanironu.’

Funmbi couldn’t help but laugh silently.

‘I can’t just do this,’ Tami said to herself and turned towards her room.

‘Go now, sebi you have to prepare for tonight with Chief Adams!’
Funmbi said, screaming.

Tami stopped dead in her tracks, turned around, marched towards her like a mad woman and slapped her twice.

Funmbi screamed and dragged Tami’s hair. She didn’t know that Tami was a professional agbero, ghetto girl.
Tami pushed her and charged for her, slapping her over and over as Funmbi moved backwards covering her face, each slap landing on her hands.
Someone dragged Tami away and another stood in front of Funmbi to guide her from her wrath.

‘Chief Adams?’ , Tinuke said in a small voice. She was no longer the floor. She was now leaning against the wall, holding the staircase for balance.
Funmbi and Tami stopped. They looked at her.

‘Chief Adams?’ She repeated, screaming this time waiting for an answer.

Everyone’s eyes were on her this time. People were mumbling and asking themselves questions- ‘What’s this one saying?’ ‘Another angle leleyi o.’ ‘This fight will not end o.’ ‘Shey Omo Jesu ndo Chief ni?’

‘Chief Adams who?’ She asked, this time staring at Tami.

Tami looked at her. Unsure of what to do. She coughed slowly and walked towards her. Any form of pity she felt for her had vanished the moment she told Femi of her lifestyle. The memory of Femi asking for his ring back, shouting at her calling her a prostitute came to her mind.
She closed her eyes, opened it and looked at her.

‘Tami abeg.’ Funmbi said from behind.

Now facing Tinuke, she said ‘Chief Babatunde Adams,’ and paused. Watching her words sink in, she added, picking her words ever slowly.

‘Your father.’

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